Secrets
by The-epic-Lemon
Summary: A series of one-shots based on the secrets of our favorite Meister-Weapon pair. Another fic written with Kiwi. Read and Review!
1. Glasses

*Maka and Soul's Apartment*

It was rather calm and quiet day in Death City. The rain poured and splashed against the windows of the apartment as Maka quietly sat against the headboard of her bed, reading a book.

School was now out for the summer, and there were no missions that the meister and her loyal weapon, Soul, needed to complete. Thus, the two were spending a relaxing day indoors.

She lifted her head up from her book to stare at the rain pattering against her window. It was quite pretty, really, running in clear streams down the panes of the glass that protected her from being totally drenched. As she watched, she was reminded of a passage from one of her favorite books.

Feeling the sudden urge to read it, she uncurled her legs and plodded over to her bookshelf. She searched the rows and rows of books for the title she was looking for. But alas, she could not find it.

Scowling slightly, she exited her room.

'_Maybe Soul knows where it is…'_ she thought.

She opened the door to his room and noticed three things: one, she had not knocked and scolded herself to remember to do so; two, he had been cooped up in here for a majority of the day; and three, sitting on his bed, was the strangest sight she'd ever seen.

It was indeed Soul, however, he was reading a book. _Her book._ But that's not what surprised her. What surprised her even more and made her slightly gasp was the fact that he had glasses perched on the bridge of his nose.

There was a heavy silence and the two stared at each other in mute shock.

Maka felt her mouth fall open to form words but couldn't force them out as he stared at her, crimson eyes wide behind the spectacles. There was another moment of awkward silence before Soul slowly reached up and slid the glasses off his face. Closing the book, he folded the glasses and sat up, placing both objects on his bedside table. He swung his legs around and put his feet on the ground before putting his arms behind him and leaned back in an attempt to regain some of his "cool" demeanor.

He cleared his throat. "Didn't I tell you to knock before coming into my room?"

That sentence was the last straw for Maka; she couldn't help herself anymore. She burst out laughing.

He glared at her, his cheeks and temper burning, as she doubled over again, laughing at his enraged face.

"You…never told…me that you…wore glasses!" She said between fits of laughter.

He turned his gaze away from her, pride and dignity deflating, and huffed.

"Now I am reminded as to _why_." He growled.

She gripped her middle and backed into the wall behind her, still laughing as she slid down to the floor. Sprawling her legs out in front of her loud laughs began to fade to small giggles while her fingers reached up to brush away the tears that had formed in the corners of her eyes from laughing so hard.

Chuckling, she looked up at her still glaring weapon as his fists had scrunched up the sheets on his bed. Her laughter faded completely as she gave him a puzzled look. His face was red with embarrassment as her turned his gaze away from her confused stare to bore holes in the floor.

"Are you really that embarrassed by it?" she asked questioningly.

"Yes," He replied quietly, "I was teased about it when I was younger. My brother was such a pest when I got them. He would always call me four-eyes and make fun of me. But I can't help it that I don't have perfect eyesight…"

Maka smiled sadly. "I'm sorry for laughing so hard. You just looked so damn cute when you're embarrassed and frantic."

He snapped his eyes to her, his cheeks rosy.

"…Cute?" He said, quite confused.

"Yeah! They suit you really well. You look sharp and hansom. Sophisticated." She replied, smiling.

"Hmm. Well, just promise not to tell anyone, okay? Lord save me if Black Star ever found out." He pleaded.

Maka pushed herself off the wall and got to her feet. She walked across the room and came to a stop in front of him, his eyes watching her the whole time. She bent a little so she was eye-level with him.

"I promise." she said as a grin spread across her face. "You really shouldn't worry about it. Like I said," her hand came up and ruffled his untamed white hair, "It's cute."

Still grinning, she straightened up and turned to walk out of the room, missing the small flush of red that had spread across his cheekbones. She stopped walking when she got to the door, placing a hand on the frame.

"Oh, and Soul?" she asked without turning around.

"Hmm?"

She looked at him sternly, "I want my book back."


	2. Smart

It had been a while since he dragged out the book. He rarely ever felt the need to do so. However, today he felt like being reminded of the darkest secret he had: his intelligence.

If there was one thing Soul Evans was, it was smart. Coming from a prestigious family, his education had been very important and he was a top student. Especially in Math. That is, until he discovered his abilities as a weapon and moved to Death City; after that, his marks had gone downhill. Most people wrote it off as laziness and lack of care on his part, and, although he would never admit it, there really was no good reason that a boy as smart as him would be getting low 40's and 50's in all his classes, save one.

Maka Albarn.

The girl was obsessed with achieving top marks in all of her classes. When he met her, He would have done anything to assure that she would remain his meister, even if it meant letting his grades slip. He would pretend that he was 'too cool for school' and people assumed he was stupid. But even though no one knew it, he would kick their ass at any subject.

However, he knew that Maka took pride in her academic achievements. She remained at the top of their class, just like her mother did before her. He would do anything to make sure she remained at the top.

He recalled a conversation they had when Maka brought up his schoolwork one night.

_"Hey Soul."_

_"Hmm?" _

_"You play the piano right?" He stopped flipping through TV channels and looked at her oddly. Her brow was furrowed, deep in thought._

_"Yeah, you know I do. Why?" She pursed her lips together, her frown growing even deeper, before turning her green eyes to look at him._

_"Well, it's just that... aren't pianists supposed to be... I don't know, smart?" She asked bluntly. He stared at her for a moment before his face broke out into a smirk and he continued flipping through channels again._

_"You saying I'm stupid?" he replied, his smirk growing even wider._

"_No, no. It's just, I read somewhere that musicians, specifically pianists, tend to be really, really, really good at math" she explained. "I think it's something to do with working with numbers all the time."_

_Soul tensed. SHE KNEW. He needed to think of something to say, and fast!_

_He put on his best 'cool' face and thought of a quick reply. "Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I've always been quite the average student. Never won an award in my life." He lied. He had hundreds of academic awards hidden away. _

_Maka simply shrugged her shoulders. "Oh, well alright then." She seemed disappointed, and Soul felt a tiny tug of guilt for lying to her, but he knew it was for her happiness. _

He cracked a small grin at the memory. Maka was funny that way. It was as if it wasn't enough to just be the best female meister at the academy; no, she had to have a flawless academic record too. He let loose a small chuckle before he heard her call.

"Soul! Dinner's ready!"

"Coming!" he yelled back before closing his book, giving the cover another look. It was one of hers, he'd been curious as to why she'd had her head stuffed in it all day, so he'd 'borrowed' it so see. It was a romance novel, something silly about a girl who meets a boy and they fall in love. Typical stuff, but for some reason, Maka liked it. Smirking, he put the book on his bedside table before shaking his head and getting up to leave the room.

"Heh, stupid bookworm."

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><p>OMG Chapter 2? WHAT IS THIS?<p>

Oh my goodness, Lem starts University tomorrow. Le nervous. So, we updated tonight before shit gets real.

Hope you like this one, and please REVIEW 3


	3. Accent

This one's short, but we love it. I always imagined Soul was hiding something like this...

Anyways, enjoy!

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><p>"FUCK SAKES!"<p>

Maka sighed as she slid her back further down the headboard of her bed. Soul must have stubbed his toe again. For the fifth time today.

She got up and took a peek out her door, to find him holding his foot with his face twisted in pain.

"How many times am I gonna smash the bloody thing? Blimey, my toes are gonna fall off!" He screamed.

But what he said was different.

Was that…a _British accent?_

"_What?_" Maka asked in surprise.

Soul just stared at her in annoyance, until he realized what he said and _how_ he said it.

A pause ensued. Both meister and weapon gaped at one another.

"Did you just-" She was cut off by a low growl from the weapon.

"You. Heard. Nothing." he said menacingly before stalking to his room and slamming the door shut behind him.

"Oh my God." Maka stared at his door.

'_Just when I thought he couldn't get anymore attractive…He slips an accent.'_ Thought Maka.

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><p>Soul + Accent = Fangasm<p>

**REVIEW PLEASE! **

P.S. Next chapter's going to be angsty and mind-fucking. So be prepared.


	4. Aria

Hey Guuuyyyys. TWO CHAPTERS IN ONE NIGHT? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?

Anyways, Here is chapter four (IT'S SAD).

BTW It's Kiwi's Birthday on the 30th...so REMEMBER THAT, because we've got a surprise for you ;)

Speaking of birthdays...

CHAPTER FOUR! Enjoy!

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><p>It was his birthday. Most people would feel excited or happy on their birthday. Don't be mistaken, Soul always had a great birthday, thanks to his friends, but from the time he woke up that morning to the time he went to sleep that night, something tugged at his heart.<p>

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><p>Everyone had just left their apartment, and Soul was stuffed full of cake and delicious food cooked by Maka and Tsubaki. He smiled thankfully at Maka as she washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen.<p>

"Thanks again, Maka! Best birthday so far!" he said happily.

"No problem, Soul." She beamed. "Happy Birthday!"

Soul flashed her a grin before walking to his room and closing the door.

His smile immediately disappeared as he walked over to his closet and took out a small box labeled _HOME_.

He stared down at the box sadly for a moment before walking over to his bed and sitting down. He quietly opened the box and removed the contents.

Inside were many different pictures taken when Soul was very young. He sifted through the pictures before settling on one. It was a simple photo of his family taken when he was eight. He smiled lightly looking at his father, mother, older brother Wes, him…and his twin sister, Aria.

"Soul, you forgot to grab all of your gifts and –" said Maka as she walked into his room without knocking…again…

Soul's shocked and saddened face snapped up to meet her.

"What're you doing?" She asked curiously, with a hint of concern.

"N-nothing…I was just tidying up…" he said while shoveling all of the photos back into the box and slamming it shut. He seemed to have missed the photo that he was looking at though, as it fell to the ground while Soul stood to but the box away.

Maka walked over and picked it up, studying it for a few moments.

"Is…is this your family?" she asked. She knew very little about Soul's home and family.

"Hey! That's private!" he said, reaching for the picture.

"Who's that girl?" Maka asked, interested now as to why Soul was so desperate to get the picture back.

He stared at her for a brief moment. He was caught, and now he'd have to spill. He stared at her shyly, his eyes filled with sadness and turmoil.

"She – she was my twin sister…" He confessed quietly.

Maka's mind lingered on one word: _Was._

"Soul…" she said quietly.

"Her name was Aria. We were nine. We both got really sick and were bedridden for weeks." He said sadly as his fists clenched in his bed sheets. "She didn't make it."

"Soul, I'm so sorry." Maka hated prying into his life like this. It only caused pain.

He chuckled lightly. "It's not your fault, stupid. I'm just sad that she didn't get a chance to celebrate any more birthdays with me." He smiled sadly as he looked at her. "But I'm not alone anymore. I get to spend my birthday with you and everyone else, so it's not so bad." He winked.

Maka was astonished at how good Soul was as hiding how he really felt.

She scooted closer to him and hugged him tightly. "Happy Birthday, Aria and Soul." Soul stiffened beneath her, but chuckled and hugged her back.

"Heh. Happy Birthday, sis."

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><p>LE GASP! FUCKING WITH THE SYSTEM IS WHAT WE DO!<p>

So, yeah. **REVIEW PLEASE!**


	5. Old Time Rock and Roll

**LE HOLY SHIT. Sorry guys, University suuuuuuuuuuucks. Anywho, here's a little update for you. **

**I got the idea while listening to some Bob Seger, then my Soul Eater obsessed mind had a field day. **

**Hope you enjoy this one, because it's kind of craptastic. **

**LOVE YOU **

**PLEASE REVIEW. **

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><p>It was a nice day, so Maka and the girls had decided to take the day, go out, and have some fun.<p>

"Okay bye, Soul! I'll be home sometime after seven! Take care!" she yelled as she was leaving.

"Kay, have fun!" he said just before she closed the door.

He would be alone all day, seeing as Black Star was training with Sid for the day and Kidd had to meet with his father as well.

"Hmmm, what should I do then?" he grumbled.

He plopped himself down on the couch and watched TV for about an hour, and soon grew bored as nothing good was on. He turned it off and walked over to the stereo, checking the CD rack they had right next to it.

It was filled with mostly classical and jazz and the rare boy band CD that belonged to his meister. Then he spotted the CD he had not listened to in ages. _Bob Seger._

He grabbed the CD excitedly and plopped into the stereo. He decided that in order to enjoy this, he need the full affect.

He undressed until he was only in his button up, his boxers, and his socks. He pressed play.

As the song began to play, it's well known piano rift ringing loudly through the apartment, he slid across the hardwood and began jamming out.

When he turned around and opened his eyes, however, he came face to face with his meister, who stared at him with wide, extremely amused eyes and a camera in hand.

He stopped dancing and stared at her awkwardly, looking horrified when he noticed the camera.

"Is this what you do every time you're home alone? If so, I need to start filming this shit more often." She grinned.

He cleared his throat. "Maka, give me the camera." His face burning with anger and embarrassment.

"Mmmmm...No." then shoved it down her shirt with a sly, taunting grin.

Soul simply stared at her, his glare growing more deadly.

"You know I'll go for it." He deadpanned.

"She cocked an eyebrow, her grin never leaving her face.

"Oh you will? Well then," she taunted, "Come and get it."

It happened so fast, Maka barely even registered.

One second Soul was looking mortified, then she felt a hand grab the camera that was _down her shirt_, and then he was deleting the morbid video from the camera. She had forgotten that he was one of the fastest people on the Spartoi team.

"W-what?" she instinctively grabbed her chest, face burning and eyes wide.

"I told you I'd go for it." he handed her the camera with a bored expression. "And what are you doing home anyways? I thought you were going out."

"O-oh, I, uh, forgot my wallet, and imagine my surprise to find _this_." she gestured to him.

"You know you love it." he winked before walking over to the stereo and turning it off and then slinking over to his room. "G\Well? Go on and get out of here. I need to continue my solo party."

"Fine, see you later." she laughed as she left the second time that day. "Oh, and Soul?"

"Hmm?"

"Nice dance moves." she winked before slamming the door shut, leaving him gaping, alone, and half naked.

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><p><strong>Yaaaaaaay. This was so random.<strong>

**Please read and review! **


	6. Revealed Part 1

**We are so effing sorry for how long this update took. Lemon has been super busy with Uni and Kiwi has been uber busy with Physics. Anyways, we hope you like this chapter! It'll be a 2 parter!**

**Don't forget to review!**

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><p>Another mission had been completed, and Maka, Soul, Black Star, Tsubaki, Kidd, Liz, and Patty were all relaxing in the living room of Maka and Soul's apartment. It had been a dangerous mission, where scars will soon develop on the skin of the seven teens, but everyone was alright and celebrating with some rest and relaxation.<p>

And in Black Star's terms, that meant shots.

"Okay, so here's the game," Black Star began, "We go around in a circle and one person says something that they've never done before. If someone in the circle _has_ done it though, they have to take a drink. And you have to be honest."

Everyone groaned.

"I can already tell that this is going to end badly…" Soul mumbled.

"ALRIGHT LET'S DO THIS!" Black Star exclaimed excitedly before pouring everyone a shot of whiskey.

"Alright. First person to ask a question will be…" he trailed off, searching the group for a good starter, "Kidd."

Kidd rolled his eyes and searched the faces of his friends, quickly thinking of a statement.

"Never have I ever... sung or danced in a musical play."

Nobody in the room moved, until Maka meekly brought her glass to her lips, taking her shot and bowing her head. All eyes turned to her and several people in the group were gaping.

"You've sung and danced in a musical play?" Black Star snickered. Maka shot him a glare before responding with a huff, putting down her glass and crossing her arms.

"Don't look at me, blame my idiot papa. He's the one who forced me to. And I was like, 6, okay? I didn't get much of a choice," she mumbled, averting her glare to face the ground beside her.

It was now her turn to make a statement. When she got the idea, she grinned evilly, moving her gaze to her partner.

Soul's uninterested expression changed to one of nervousness once realizing his partner was intending to reveal something about him. He was going to get so drunk tonight. Fuck.

"Never have I ever...accidentally let my accent slip." she grinned.

Soul gave her the dirtiest look he could muster and took a drink, shocking everyone in the group.

"WAIT A MINUTE!" Black Star shouted. "WHAT KIND OF ACCENT?" he was laughing now.

"British." Maka quickly answered with a devilish grin as Soul put his face in his hands in embarrassment.

Soul sighed. It was his turn. He took his time thinking of a statement before speaking.

"Never have I ever gone skinny dipping."

He smirked as both Liz and Patti took swigs of their drinks but that smirk soon turned to an open-mouthed look of astonishment as his meister muttered "Dammit" and took a sip as well.

He gaped. "Ma-Maka, you've gone SKINNY DIPPING?"

Said girl turned an angry shade of red and pointed an accusing finger at the twins, who in turn, gave her looks of feigned innocence.

"DON'T LOOK AT ME! Blame them! They forced me!"

"Oh my god..." he mumbled dramatically.

"OKAY! MY TURN!" yelled Black Star. "Hmmm Never have I ever...worn glasses." he stated.

Soul, who was looking at his shot glass miserably, immediately froze. His eyes widened in sudden horror. He humiliatingly filled his glass and took a drink.

"Seriously?" exclaimed Liz and Patty excitedly.

"Hmm." mumbled Soul.

"Oh hot damn…" mumbled Liz with a grin.

"OOHH! MY TURN! MY TURN!" Patti exclaimed excitedly, bouncing up and down in her seated position. "Hmm..." she stuck out her tongue and scrunched up her eyebrows, deep in thought.

"Never have I ever had dance parties by myself!" she giggled, and then took another shot.

"Patti!" Kid was astounded. "You're supposed to say something you HAVEN'T done!"

"Oopsies!" she sang while refilling her glass. Liz grinned at her sister.

"Atta girl." she said proudly.

Soul was using this distraction to his advantage; he had already revealed several of his secrets during the game and nobody needed to know about his boxer-solo-dance-parties. So he remained silent and unmoving, hoping nobody would notice his discomfort.

Someone did, however. Someone who knew all too well that he did in fact have air guitar sessions by himself.

"Come on, Tom Cruise; drink up!" Maka sang happily.

His face was burning now, as all eyes landed on him.

"Turns out you're not such a cool guy after all, huh?" Black Star stated.

That stung. Soul straightened and poured himself a shot, gave a quick 'cheers' to everyone, and downed it.

"Okay then, now getting over this awkward situation I believe it's Tsubaki's turn now." Kidd tried to break the awkward silence.

"Oh okay then." Tsubaki said happily. "Um, never have I ever…" she thought, "played strip poker with my partner."

Everyone except for her and Black Star looked around for a second before downing their shots.

"Whoa, Nelly…even Kidd and the twins?" Black Star said, gaping.

Kidd simply nodded, obviously not interested, while Liz and Patty laughed.

"What about you two?" Black Star focused on Maka and Soul.

"Just don't ask…" mumbled Maka.

"Oh please…you and I both know who won that one…" blurted Soul, now less sober than he'd like to be.

"You were totally cheating!" Maka shot back, "I saw those cards you were hiding in your sleeve!"

"HAHAHAHA!" Black Star laughed loudly, "SOUL WANTED TO GET MAKA NAKED!"

The latter flushed as her partner laughed. Maka glared at him before grabbing the nearest thing to her (a lamp) and chucking it at his head.

"Then why did you still get undressed if you knew? Did you _want_ to be naked in front of him?" Kidd asked curiously, a sly and accusative grin on his face. Maka gaped.

"HO HO HOOOO!" Black Star cheered and whistled. "Both are equally guilty in the game of sexual tension!"

Soul simply raised an eyebrow at his meister after nursing his bashed skull.

"I-I-I..." Maka stuttered nervously before getting an idea to change the subject.

"NEVER HAVE I EVER," she exclaimed loudly, "Had issues with symmetry!"

All gazes focused on Kidd, as the Death God had only taken one shot.

He grimaced before raising his shot glass to his mouth and throwing back the foul, bitter liquid.

It was now Liz's turn.

"Alright…Never have I ever cried violently at the beginning of UP."

Everyone drank.

"You'd have to be a monster not to cry at something like that…" mumbled Soul.

Everyone nodded solemnly.

"Is it Kidd's turn again? Has everyone asked something that could reveal embarrassing things about me?" Soul asked, with a hint of accusation.

"Fine. Um…" thought Kidd. "Never have I ever…"

The night went on like this. The meisters and weapons took shot after shot until eventually they reached the point where Kidd was garbling on about symmetry, Patti and Liz had their arms thrown around each other and were singing "Dancing Queen" very off key.

Black Star was trying to climb out the window onto the roof because he claimed that the room could not contain his "godliness" while a barely sober Tsubaki attempted to prevent him from doing so.

Soul and Maka had passed out in a heap on the couch.

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><p><strong>This is Lemon's brain telling her to take a break and drink. So yes, this will be continued in a second part. WOOO.<strong>

**Hope you enjoyed and don;t forget to review!**


	7. Revealed Part 2

**Lemon here! **

**I have to admit, a majority of what happened here, is an experience of my Sunday morning on October 30th. After my friend's Halloween party. She was in rough shape that morning, and I was cruel. **

**So I hope you enjoy, and don't forget to review!**

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><p>The sun was very bright the next morning as Kid cracked open his crusty, droopy eyes. The light burned his retinas and split his skull as he groaned, hiding his face under his pillow and beckoning the darkness of sleep to return to him.<p>

Wait a minute.

_Pillow?_

Kid lifted his head and found himself in an unfamiliar room. The walls were a gaudy yellow, and the style was completely asymmetric. Posters of a famous jazz band were taped to the walls, and an acoustic guitar sat beside the desk. '_This is obviously Soul's room.' _He thought.

Kid wiped the drool from his mouth and the sleep from his eyes, and decided to attempt to get up. As soon as he sat up, however, he immediately regretted the movement, soon running for the bathroom.

After 'praying at the porcelain alter', Kid rinsed his mouth and looked at himself in the mirror. He honestly looked like Death. But not the good kind, like he usually looked. The _ugly_ kind. He stared briefly, not really impressed with what he saw, so he left the bathroom and roamed the apartment, searching for other survivors from last night's endeavors.

He turned the corner and came to the sight of Soul and Maka, passed out together on the sofa. Maka was draped across Soul's chest, drooling slightly, as Soul snored loudly, his arm draped over Maka and his head thrown back over the armrest.

'_Well, aren't they quite the attractive couple…' _thought kid with mild disgust.

He continued to stroll through the living room, seeing Black Star and Tsubaki on the other sofa, cuddled together. However, Kid didn't see his two weapons. He noticed Maka's door was cracked open slightly, so he took a peek inside to find that the two sisters had fallen asleep in Maka's bed, huddled close.

He was torn from the cute scene by a clatter in the living roof and a loud '_OOF!'_

Peering back into the living room, Kid saw Maka running to the bathroom covering her mouth as Soul rolled onto his side, clutching his 'man bits'. Maka had obviously nailed him between the legs when trying to get up.

Kid cringed, knowing all-too-well how painful that must have been. He walked to kitchen and fetched a glass and filled with water, bringing it to Soul, who was still curled in on himself and whimpering on the couch.

Soul opened his eyes slightly to see Kid had his arm outstretched towards him, holding a glass of water. Soul took the glass and after thanking Kid, downed it.

Maka emerged from the bathroom. She looked horrible, but Soul looked like he had been thrown down a mountain and run over by a truck. Kid cleared his scratchy throat.

"Soul," e began, "How many shots did you have last night?" He asked.

Soul cringed at the word '_shots_' but chose to answer the question anyways after clearing his throat as well.

"Oh God…somewhere between, I don't know," he closed his eyes and massaged his temples lightly and he tried to remember the events of the night, "probably around 27?"

Maka and Kid froze. Soul sat there, trying not to puke. Maka tried to wrap her mind around how much alcohol that was.

"How are you still alive?" another scruffy, hungover voice asked.

All three pairs of eyes looked at Black Star, who now sat up looking almost as horrible as everyone else.

Soul slowly lay back down on his side, glassy eyes staring at nothing in particular.

"Do you need to call Ralph (1)?" Maka asked sweetly, a devilish grin on her face. Soul shuddered and buried his face further into the sofa's cushions.

"Souuuul," she sang, taunting him.

"Stop it." He growled harshly. He was going to puke. He hated puking. It was disgusting, not to mention embarrassing.

She giggled. The evil look on her face terrified Soul. Uh-oh.

"Hey Soul." She called. Then she said the one thing no one should ever say to someone who's on the verge of vomiting; "Tuna casserole."

Soul gagged and shot up from the sofa running to the bathroom.

Liz and Patty came out of Maka's room a moment later.

"How's the Govna, today?" Liz drawled in a fake British accent while rubbing her eyes.

"Oh I almost forgot about that!" Black Star laughed. "Where are his glasses?" He asked excitedly.

"Now, now, guys," said Kid, massaging his temples. "Let's be fair. Just because he has a massive amount of skeletons in his closet that came tumbling out last night doesn't mean that we have the right to judge him."

"FUCK THAT!" Yelled Patty. "YES IT DOES!"

Everyone cringed from her yelling, their heads splitting open with each word.

"Shhhh, Patty," Kid chided. "Indoor voices, please."

She giggled quietly, her face apologetic.

Soul returned from the bathroom looking paler than usual. He walked into the living room, which had become horribly silent, and stared at his friends. When no one spoke, he silently turned around and dragged his feet to his room and shut the door.

He would not allow himself to be tormented today.

He ripped his still sweaty sheets (ew. Kid sweat.) off of his bed and took off the clothes he wore from last night, pulling on some sweatpants. His clothes smelt like alcohol. He climbed on top of his bed and pulled the – thankfully – untouched throw blanket, that was at the foot of his bed, over him, curled up, and went to sleep.

Fuck the world today.

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><p><strong>(1) Ralph is apparently the noise someone makes when vomiting. If you're vomiting, you're 'calling Ralph'.<strong>

**I'm a mean, horrible, cruel person to my hungover friends. We made a game out of making her puke. **

**The game was called _Whoever is the first person to make Raspberry puke, WINS._ **

**"Hey, Raspberry; TUNA CASSEROLE." **

**BAM. Headshot. **

**Anyways, I'm done rambling now.  
><strong>

**Don't forget to review! **

**~Lem **


	8. Bite me! Kiss me!

**Hey guys! New chaptah for Secrets written mostly by my gorgeous lady, Kiwi!**

** Kiwi and I were shopping around yesterday, eating millions of chocolate covered espresso beans (BAD PLAN OMGGGG), and saw these hilarious boxers with 3D vampire fangs and the words "Bite Me!" written all over them. Kiwi whispered to me "We need a fanfic with Soul wearing those boxers." And thus, this was born from her beautifully sexy brain. **

**We were giggling like school girls while writing this. **

**ANYWAYS, we hope you enjoy, and don't forget to review!**

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><p>If there was one thing Maka secretly loved more than anything, it was laundry day.<p>

The warmth of the freshly washed clothes as they were fresh out of the dryer, the way they smelled like a beautiful meadow in the spring, and the best reason of all?

She had an excuse to watch Soul walk around the apartment all day, clad in nothing but his boxers.

She fidgeted on the couch, wearing just a pair of boy short panties and thin camisole, watching as he walked from his room into the kitchen and grabbed a glass from the cupboard. He made his way over to the sink, her eyes following him the whole time, watching the muscles of his arms and back ripple slightly as he turned the faucet on and off, filling the glass with water.

He turned around then and met her gaze, smirking slightly as she looked away quickly, cheeks tinged with pink before bringing the glass to his lips. Maka snuck another glance his way, just in time to see a couple droplets of water roll down his chin, neck, and the hard planes of his bare chest.

She cursed under her breath as he wiped his mouth and put the empty glass down on the counter. He stretched his arms over his head as he turned back toward the counter; displaying his gorgeous and well sculpted back to her. She couldn't help but trail her eyes along his body, moving from the base of his neck, to between his shoulder blades, to the narrowing of his obliques, finally landing on his –

"Maka, are you alright?" he asked slyly, snapping her away from her ass-stare.

"Are you..." she stared intensely at the lower half of his body again, making the poor scythe squirm slightly underneath her gaze. She brought her eyes back up to his face, eyebrows knitted together and a small smile playing across her lips. "Are you wearing 3D boxers?"

Soul blanched. He looked down at his boxers. They were in fact, his 3D boxers (the ones that came with 3D glasses) that he had bought because he had thought they were "cool". They were white, with little fang-like things scattered across them, along with the words 'Bite Me'. He brought his crimson eyes back up to green ones that were still sparkling with mirth.

"I...I-I.." he stammered slightly as he racked his brain for a good comeback. Suddenly, he relaxed, and his classic smirk spread across his face wickedly. Leaning back against the counter, he licked his lips before speaking again, his voice low and even.

"Maka. Were you staring at my underwear?" he drawled out, enunciating every word before giving her an accusing stare.

Maka flushed again, and continued staring at the suggestive writing on his boxers.

"Stop it!" he snapped, no longer enjoying the fact that she was staring at his nether regions.

"Well, they're distracting!" She snapped back. "Who the hell has _3D underwear_?"

"I thought they were cool!" he defended. "And what about you, with the whole '_KISS ME_' written on your _ass_?"

Maka gaped at him. Her mouth making a small popping sound as it fell open.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S WRITTEN ON MY ASS? I'm not even STANDING!"

Soul clamped his mouth shut, unwilling to admit he had been shamefully staring at her ass earlier. It wasn't _his_ fault that she swung her hips slightly when she walked, making her butt and long legs even more enticing than when she wore her short skirts.

He continued to look around frantically, searching for _any_ kind of excuse to explain the reason he was staring at her butt. Then the lightbulb turned on. He'd play the 'jerk-card.'

"Well, it's not like anyone would want to kiss you, or your ass, anyways." He said nonchalantly.

Her eyes widened in rage as her blood began to boil. She jumped from the couch and dove at him, the intent to kill filling her mind.

"Shit!" Soul swore as she pulled out a 400 page hardcover novel (from god knows where) and prepared to chop him. She pulled her arm back, murderous thoughts driving her actions, and brought her arm down to smash the book into his skull. However, Soul, anticipating her next move, was too fast for her.

He grabbed her wrist in one hand, making them both stumble backwards and hit the wall behind her. He pinned the hand holding the book against the wall over her head. Maka growled angrily and brought her knee up to hit him right where it counts, but Soul saw it coming and simply used his other hand to stop it, grabbing underneath her knee when she wouldn't stop squirming.

"Get the hell off me!" Maka hissed, not fully aware that she was trapped between him and the wall, both teens in only their underwear.

"Are you going to hit me?" he growled back.

"YES!" she snarled.

"Then no!" he yelled back.

"SOUL!" Maka was yelling now. "LET. ME. _GO_."

"Promise you won't hit me, and I will!" he offered.

"Soul! I swear to god, if you don't let me go this secon-" Maka was cut off by the sound of the door slamming open.

"SOUL! BRO! I got that new video game we wer- whoa." Black Star blinked at the scene he had stumbled upon. Maka and Soul whipped their heads towards the door before processing Black Star's expression, then looked at each other and the compromising position they were in.

Soul concocted a quick plan on how to make his seem less awkward. Still holding Maka the way he was, he quickly turned his face towards Black Star's and gave him a blank, unimpressed stare.

"Black Star, we're a little busy right now, can you come back later?" he said very calmly. Maka gaped as Black Star winked and gave him a thumbs up before he ran off, closing the door behind him.

"Now, where were we?" He asked Maka, wiggling his eyebrows.

She just stared at him before realizing that the hand holding the book was pinned to the wall, directly above Soul's head. Giving the book a little bit of a push forward with her fingers, she allowed the book in her hand to drop directly on his head, thanks to gravity.

"OW! FUCK!" Soul clutched the top of his head, curled up sideways on the ground while Maka, now released from his grasp, dusted her hands above him.

"That's for the earlier comment." she said menacingly before picking the book up and dropping it down on him again, walking away as his howls of pain filled the apartment.

"And that's for not letting me go when I told you too." Her head whipped to the left as the beeping that signaled their clothes were done drying went off and she began making her way to the laundry room.

Soul cussed under his breath, still holding his throbbing head and looked up at the retreating back of his meister. His eyes drank in the sway of her walk and the way it made her ass look fantastic the last couple moments before she disappeared around the corner.

He chuckled to himself before flipping onto his back and smiled up to the ceiling.

God, he loved laundry day.

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><p><strong>LOL WE LOVE LAUNDRY DAY. <strong>

**Don't forget to review!**

**P.s. PLease tell me everyone else walks around their house half naked on laundry day, and not just me (Lemon). **


	9. Poker Face

**Hey guys!**

**Lemon and Kiwi here with an update that took waaaaay too long. **

**Heh, sorry bout that. BUT HERE YOU GO, and as always,**

**ENJOY AND PLEASE REVIEW**

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><p>"Well," he began uneasily, "this doesn't happen very often…"<p>

The weapon and his blonde haired partner sat facing each other on either side of the table in their living room, in the midst of a very…_revealing_ version of Poker.

"I find it funny that you're apparently the best poker player among our group of friends," Maka began smugly, "yet, my first time playing, I'm kicking your ass."

He grimaced. She was telling the truth. He had suggested the game in the thought that it would be a fantastic opportunity to humiliate his bookworm meister. There was also the added bonus of getting her naked (though he would never admit the latter out loud). Unfortunately though, things never really seemed to go as he had planned. After several rounds of strip poker she had only lost both of her socks whereas he was forced to shed his sweater, pants, socks and headband-though Maka insisted that the headband didn't count as an item of clothing.

Now, Soul was a smart guy. So, he had a few tricks up his sleeve.

Literally.

He had stashed some tricky and very useful cards up the sleeves of his long-sleeved shirt before they started, just in case this sort of situation occurred.

But now, it was Maka's turn to shed some clothes.

Being as sneaky as he could, he snuck in a good card, winning this hand with a Royal Flush.

Maka stripped her button-up shirt, leaving her in a camisole and her skirt.

He grinned. THIS, was more like it.

Maka pouted as she tossed her shirt aside, obviously uncomfortable in just a thin shirt and her short skirt as Soul shuffled the cards again. He dealt them out rather messily, earning a groan from Maka as she averted her gaze to the floor to pick up a card that had fallen from the table, giving him a chance to take another card out of his sleeve.

Maka's skirt came off next.

Her pout deepened.

These little shenanigans continued for several more rounds until she was left only in her bra and underwear.

"Alright, Maka," Soul said with a smile that was a little too big, "time to take it all off!" he laughed as he played another winning hand.

"Oh, come on, Soul!" She pleaded. Her face was a bright shade of red now.

"Nope! Those are the rules. You lose, you take it off. Now, strip."

She fidgeted in her spot, contemplating the idea of giving in. "I don't understand! I was beating you! How did I suddenly get so bad?"

He smirked. "It's not about skill Maka, it's all about the luck of the cards. You were just unlucky. " He leaned back, putting his hands on either side of him.

That was a big mistake.

His secret stash of cards came tumbling out of his sleeve. They both stared at them in disbelief.

"Y-you! You cheated!" She shrieked. She suddenly felt the need to cover herself up.

Soul just sat there in mild self-loathing for his unwise decision. But he couldn't really say he was sorry.

"Yeah, I guess I did." He said nonchalantly. He gave a light shrug.

"Then you take off your clothes too, you jerk!" She declared with rage.

He raised a curious eyebrow. She wanted him to undress more, rather than redress herself?

Huh.

"Alright then." He said with another shrug and grabbed the hem of his shirt in preparation to take it off. Maka gaped momentarily as the shirt was half-way off of his chest, before standing up and jumping over the table in an attempt to stop him.

"Wait! I was kidding!" She struggled with him, trying to put his shirt back where it was so this situation wouldn't be as awkward. "Don't- hey wai-AGH!"

A crashing sound echoed through the apartment.

"Oww…." Maka lifted her head up, eyes closed as she gently kneaded the spot where her head has struck something. It took her a moment to realize that there was something groaning underneath her and that her landing had maybe been a little TOO soft. She opened her eyes.

The situation had gotten more awkward.

Her face was a mere centimeters from his, his garnet eyes open in shock as his heavy breathing tickled her lips. What was worse, however, was that her body was pressed snugly against his, both individuals in various states of undress. None of these facts registered in her brain until later though, at the moment all she could think about how _good _it felt to have him so close to her.

Soul on the other hand, was freaking out.

'_Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!'_ thought Soul, as his mind tried to reason that their current position was much more innocent than what it appeared to be. But, as he continued to calculate the situation – their bodies pressed tightly together, her long, slim leg set between his own, and her hands and no-longer-tiny breasts pressed to his bare chest – he realized that if she didn't get off _now_, the situation was going to get _even more_ awkward than it already was.

So, he came up with the quickest solution. He was going to play the 'dick card'.

"Uh….Maka…?" his voice snapped Maka's thoughts back to reality and away from whatever perverted planet they had gone off to. She could feel her face heat up and saw him smirk in reply. "Y'know, as flattering as this is…do you think you can get off me? Your ironing-board chest is making it hard for me to breathe."

Once Maka's mind processed what he said, her embarrassment quickly turned to rage.

The leg that was stuck between his drew up as she kneed him in the crotch.

She got off of him as he curled onto his side and whimpered in pain.

"That's what you get, you asshole." She growled through bared teeth, picking up her clothes and walking to her room, leaving Soul to wallow in self-pity and pain for the next 10 minutes. In the midst of the pain though, Soul couldn't help but let his mind wander back to the position he and his partner had been in not moments ago. The thought brought a small grin to his face as he rolled onto his back again and stared at the ceiling.

It was _so_ worth it.

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><p><strong>So...<strong>

**We're camping...and we were playing cards...and the thought bloomed in our minds (mostly Kiwi's), and it needed to escape. **

**BOOM.**

**P.S. That was not a suggestive card game. We were playing Crazy 8s. Not naked. **

**Love you all!**

**Lemon and Kiwi. **


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